Together let’s beget euphoria..

It’s been a long time since then. I guess, my heart says so. There’s a shallow within: a pitfall. I once dream about it and now I am pursuing it. But the road to it is not that easy. There would come a time, all I want is to give up, to back out from it. But every time I breathe, I would recall the faces and feelings of people who believe on me, specially my tatay, inay and kuyas. I want to bring the best for them. This is because of them. I am dreaming more not merely for myself but for my family.

To be frankly, I envy them. I envy people around me. I envy them because there they are, ripping what they sown. And me? I am still on a narrow road. I am still wandering. I cannot find strength in me. I want to drop it down and let go of everything I am grasping.

Yet a side on me says I want to do more. I want to strive harder but the thing is, I am so weak. I cannot move forward. I don’t have time. I cannot manage. I envy them. I envy people around me. I envy them because there they are, can excel more, can do more and no heavy laden at all.

The next question now, can I make it? Kakayanin ko ba? Kaya ko ba? Kaya ko pa ba? I am skirmishing all alone to myself. Yes! Sarili ko kalaban ko dito. In the first place, I am made by my choices. And I chose to be a doer of a possibility. Posible naman kasi talaga kung sasamahan ng pagpupursigi at higit sa lahat kung loloobin ni Lord. But every time I gauge where I am now, I cannot retort anything. Ang hirap pala. Ang hirap pagsabayin ng lahat. Ang hirap mangarap ng mas mataas habang inaabot mo na mga nauna mo pang pangarap. Kung sa ganang akin, wala talaga. Simpleng analysis nga, di ko na agad maintindihan, eh di much more pa sa actual pencil and paper scenario. But my Lord keeps on reminding me that this is not my battle alone. Nakakaiyak at napapaiyak ako right at this moment while puzzling all words I want to write down. Di ko maiwasan makaramdam ng pagsisi. Na sana noon pa lang sinubukan ko na agad. Sana noon pa lang pinagpatuloy ko na. Yun mga kasabayan ko, malayo layo na din kasi sila. But my Lord keeps on reminding me that your story is not the same as them. Such a comforting words to know that there is a God who keeps on telling me na may kasama ako, na di ako nag-iisa. Our Lord would use people around me to remind me that even them, they persevere, they worked hard for it, so why shouldn’t I.  Our God would always tell me: “I have plans for you, so don’t be in a hurry. I got you. My plans are not to harm but always to protect. My plans are always to give what best in you. Just do yours and I’ll do mine as well. Keep working along with your faith to Me.”

I remembered one quote I read, If you can dream about it, you can do it. The truth is  I can really dream about it. I can foresee everything. I believe all is written in God’s plan. All is set beautiful according to His will.

I’m up. 

So for now, I’ll keep whispering my prayers to Him.

“Lord, I’ll do all I can. If you see I can’t anymore, could you please do the rest for Your daughter. I can't handle more than enough but You are more than able. Bear with me. Be my strength, my joy and my wisdom. And in the end, when my wish stayed as blunted as it is, be my comfort. Lord, this is not all about my journey. This is all about a journey of a daughter of a King in heaven. Whatever it takes, Your name will always be glorified in me and through me. In Jesus mighty name, amen and amen."

holding unto this...

holding unto His promises...

all are in His hands...

I'm just a dreamer, fulfillment of those are all according to His will..

till then..

ycelah83 

:))))

pul·chri·tude

How far will she go? She’s now in fuse to be a heroine of her future or to remain ash of her past. Life tosses her like a wave drifting on a shore once a while and snag suddenly across its stream of water.

I know…

She’s isn’t perfect. She isn’t invincible. And she hasn’t an easy way.

She hums the melody of down in the dumps. She dreams a lot and barely slept.

She cries the other night but will laugh a lot the next early morning.

I wonder what makes her strong and what makes her stand back after her fall.

She admits she has lot of flaws and mistakes.

She shivers and lost her track once in awhile. 

She fears a lot.

I wonder now how come she’s still there: catching whatever life throws her.

She defies the world. She doesn’t follow the crowd. Her mold does not fit on it.

I wonder now why she’s like that.

She said she’s an alien. Her home is not here on earth. Everything on earth is temporary. Everything she had experience will soon to pass.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.- Corinthians 4:18.

She knows that Christ has made her free. Free from all that held her mind hostage. Free from all the worries and doubts that held her back for so long. Free from all bad thoughts that have kept her up at night. Free from everything that hinders her to be much closer to God.

So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.-John 8:36

She is imperfect one love by a perfect One. Her confidence is not in what she’s done but what God has done for her. She’s not stronger because of what she’s been through but because of the One on her side. She’s more than a conqueror through Christ.

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.-Romans 8:31

She knows her purpose. Her faith has brought her that far. She knows she will go farthest than she thought because of her trust to her God. She believes her past has been crucified at the cross 2000 years ago. And she’s dreaming more, believing even more!

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.-Philippians 1:6

I began to be inquisitive.  I know I admire her already. I want to meet her. And much to my awe, I found her reading it now. Ladies, I encourage you now. Let this be said to you: After all she’s been through she still known for her joy and much known because of her God.

9/18/14

ycelah83

Paradox

Amongst those withering socket wrenches, I knew I had bruises and it's aching. My heart is trampled and I'm afraid time might slips to heal the scars. I can no longer hear the chuckles neither find the inner of me to smirk. I saw the real thing! I unveiled the fakes and foes, the false and wrong, and the liars and the suckers. The jungle I am moving on is a corrupted one. With those adversities, I found myself sitting on a pew of a solemn place. I felt the warmth while I slumped on a shoulder.

The sound of serenity is deafening. Until a voice grumbled and echoed on my ears; "Light it up. Drop everything. Let go. You need rest. Because some of the best days of your life is just about to happen. Behold, you will see the miracles. You just had fight the good fight of faith."

And slowly I felt my head is slowly leaning away from a shoulder. I cannot move. The picture now is a warrior lulling on that solemn place. There is indispensable joy! That picture is the most beautiful of all.

ycelah_83
07/11/14, 12:08 am

First time ko makasulat ng maikli! Congratulations to my brain cells! HAHA. :)

Upgrading to my old version! ;)

There is time for everything; a time to sow and a time to reap.

And today is added day of those days wherein I take stand on my decision. I have random confession that only few people will understand and they are those probably the closest to me. I decided to put  everything on writing so as when time went by, I can turn the blogger on and check if I was able to stick on my decision. For being a fickle minded person, when I looked back and was able to did everything on my mind now could be one of the proudest achievement I can have. For every one who will take time to know what are those, join with me and notice if I can bring back the old me! And my point is I am missing my old self. Let me take down my bucket list:  

(1) I want to go back during the time wherein I don't have access on wi-fi.

(2) I want to go back during the time wherein my cellphone was only Nokia 3315 and I don't have enough penny on my pocket to load my cellphone. No unlimited text nor call or even unlimited data plan at all.

(3) I want to spend time reading books rather than reading the news feed from my facebook or instagram account.

(4) I want to stay on the house rather than go out and spend money just to see places I've never been.

(5) I want to be back on the days wherein 1 pair of shoes will be okay with me, 1 rugged bag will be enough, 1 cheap watch is okay and I wouldn't mind if I don't have new dresses or pants. Contentment of everything I have will be definitely fine with me. 

(6) I want to spend more time with my family rather than go out with friends just to satisfy myself as a wanderlust. 

(7) I want to go back on time wherein my self esteem is so low that even to grin on the picture I could not do. No more selfie! Moderation will be better.

(8) I want my family be proud of me once more. People pleaser? No! Not at all. I just want them to be happier more than the how happy I could be.

(9) I want to be a woman of faith.

(10) I want less of me and more of Jesus!!!

Do I sound weird? Yes!! I am really missing the old me. And I need to embrace myself for the toughest war I would have. It's a battle between me, myself and I. Everything lies with me. I have to make stand and be firm on it! I need to change. I need to discipline myself. I need to renew my mind. I have all the power to change my perspective in my life. This is for meantime. I just need to re route and take a new way, a new lifestyle. 

Sometimes we need to starve ourselves so we would know the feeling of having nothing. Sometimes we need to breath new air so we would know if we will miss the old rush of wind. Sometimes we need to begin again to make a new version of who we are now. Sometimes we need to sow sacrifice today so as to reap success tomorrow.

04/09/14

7:37 pm

ycelah83

#newcode #newme #upgradedversion

Whatever will be will be..

“You can’t control everything. Sometimes you just need to relax and have faith that things will work out. Let go a little and just let life happen.”~ LLIL

Let go a little? How little you have to let go? What if all of a sudden, your toil and plan turned into absolutely nothing? How far you have to go? What if all of a sudden, the road to your finish line is under construction?

This only allude to the reality that we can’t control everything! Just like as the sun rise on the east and set on the west, life is so unpredictable. Today, you are sad, the next minute you are totally merry. We are on a jigsaw puzzle. We are on a crossroads. We are on unending roller coaster. Life to success is always a long winding journey. Life planted to us supersedes what fiction or novel has. It’s beyond our imagination. Isn’t amazing? Isn’t surprising?

It’s frustrating to know that you need to stop! Stop now and then. It’s because, there are great changes. And as a human, it’s normal to react; to get silly, to get sad or be discouraged. And the hardest part is there will be time that you will wrestle against your will and what God wants. Everything will go back to the quantity of your faith. How big is your faith: a mustard seed, an avocado seed or a seedless one? The Bible says on Matthew 17:20 that if you have so little faith, as small as a mustard seed, you can tell to the mountain to move from there and it will move.

It’s exasperating to know that you need to re rout because there are detours. And the hardest part is you don’t know which way to go. Believe me there is still a great way! You are just been misled by your feelings. Your fears and doubts are telling you there is no way anymore, but there is! God will make a way. The Bible says on Isaiah 43:19 to look unto Him for He is about to do something new. He will make a way in the wilderness and even rivers in the dessert.

It’s wearisome to know that you have to let go and start a new one. And the hardest part is you don’t have the courage to start all over again. Listen to a sweet still small voice and frequently remind yourself that God is with you. Remind yourself and always believe that God will never fail you. The Bible says on Proverbs 19:21 that it is you who plan your ways, but the Lord is the One who direct your steps.

When God puts something in your heart, believe on it. If you can dream about it, you can do it! Whatever you have in your heart now: car, house and lot, baby, grand wedding dream, permanent job, promotion, career growth, college degree, healing and even up to the very simple happy thoughts, He will enable you to have those. And if there are times, you are not getting any, be still and hold on. God knows what He is doing. The Bible says on Jeremiah 29:11 that He knows the plans for you, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Say these words: “God is with me, He will not abandon me.” Give God the little you have and you can trust Him to make it go around. Let go a little and you’ll see a life to happen for whatever will be will be que sera sera. 

ycelah_1813

02/20/19

4:53 pm

Let the LOVE begin..

“Hatred ever kills, love never dies. Such is the vast difference between the two. What is obtained by love is retained for all time. What is obtained by hatred proves a burden in reality for it increases hatred." 

Quote unquote from Mohandas K. Gandhi. Every one has freedom of choice. Nobody is perfect and every body gets into the feeling of being hated by any one or vice versa. At this moment, I may not know if you hate someone for a particular reason or you’ve been hated for the same reason. Whether it's because of jealousy, insecurity or a suck personality, all I know it’s a disease! Better treat it as early as now. Prevention is better than cure.

And now if you are on a crossroads, which way will you choose?

L-O-V-E or H-A-T-E

And now if I am on a crossroads, which way will I choose?

L-O-V-E or H-A-T-E

And life will be like this is you let hate grow in your heart.

Every waking day is a burden.

Every sleeping night is a mare.

Hatred kills.

Love dies.

Hatred is a like a poison that rot.

Love disappears.

Hatred impedes your growth.

Love slips.

When someone threw you a stone, how do you respond? Throw him/her with a bigger bite?

When someone slapped your left face, how will you act? Hold his/her hand and slap it on your right face?

A world will always be a world. Cruelty, inequality, injustice and other negativities are present. And that is the reality. There are two kind of people; immature and mature, bad and good, positive and negative, dark and light, lover and hater. Choose to stand out! Stand to be good though you’re the only one standing. Choose to act in a mature way though sometimes you miss how to do it. Choose to be good though this world is inviting you to be bad. Live a positive way though most of the time, negative is on top of scenes. Be a light! Be a lover!

Yeah I know, those are all hard to do. But once you did, it is all rewarding and fulfilling. I know your point. We are human beings only. There are always limitations. Kindness is not always a remedy but it’s always the antidote.  Read it again and think about it! There’s no other way but to deal life with goodness. There’s no other way but to plant the seed of love every where even to those whom you hate or to those who hate you. It’s really hard to shake the hands of people whom you dislike but it’s not faking your feelings. It’s being mature. You are mature enough to show them that you are a carrier of love. Your hormones are intended to love only.

And whenever your feelings begin to hate a particular person or worst is you hate your own, all you have to do is put your fist on your chest! Feel the pulse. Look above. You are created by God out of His love and you are living abundantly out of His unmerited favor. You are called for a purpose, to exemplify the love to those unlovable. Never get tired of doing well! In His time, you will reap the harvest plentiful. Remember, everything is temporary. The earth is only a place we can stay for awhile. Be a God pleaser for our real home is in eternal.

And now if you are on a crossroads, which way will you choose?

L-O-V-E or H-A-T-E

And now if I am on a crossroads, which way will I choose?

L-O-V-E or H-A-T-E

As Martin Luther King Jr. says, "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."

You as well must choose love over hate! Let the love begin and let it all begin in you.

Xoxo,

Ycelah_1813

01-30-14

I LOVE WRITING AND READING

Copied and Pasted Writings from different bloggers.
I will read this when I got enough time! Hoho. :D



http://elitedaily.com/life/motivation/20-things-that-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/50-reasons-why-you-may-unhappy.html

http://www.viralnova.com/married-and-dating/

T-E-A-R-S [01-02-14]

I saw myself writing again, writing with tears on my eyes. I promise, I’ll try to make this one short and it’s all dedicated to you.

I've been fascinated by your goodness. I've been amazed of your kindness. I've been captivated on your dedication to bring the best for your loved ones. Now, the door on this earth sends you to your real home, I am one of those who felt your lost. The feeling I had now brings the hymn of melancholy, cuddles me with a sad lullaby and stirs up the ink in my pulse. I am writing again because I miss you too and I love you too.

I used to tease your son as “papa’s boy.”
He used to tell me, “Mi, ung remaining 10 minutes, di ko na ipantatawag sa’yo. Tatawagan ko pa kasi si Papa.” “Mi, pakitext naman si Papa, wala kase ako load.”

And I will definitely miss every text conversations we had. Even the phone calls I used to receive from you asking how your son is. Why he is not replying to your text messages.

And I will definitely miss a man who makes me feel, I belong to his family. For every visit I made to your town, you always welcome me as if I am really your daughter. I was even flattered when I heard that you are one of those who felt sad and dismayed when I and your son broke up.

I guessed, I am terribly inlove with your son, what he feels, I can feel. What he lost, I lost too.

Let me cry far apart. And let those tears flow freely from our eyes. When the dawn is done, we'll see the sun up. I can feel the pain that you're feeling now. I can hear the breeze of loneliness. I can see the lonely nights and the weeping days. If only I have the power to bring the life that was lost, I will so as not to see you all grieving. My heart is aching too. I will be missing you too.

And I will definitely miss a man behind who your son is now.
Let me grieve also. Let me say few thankful words. Thank you for bringing up Eric so well. Thank you for planting the seed of goodness, humility, and all the good traits he has now. Thank you for being a good father to him. I can see he is a good son and will be as good father as you are when the time comes.

You left your son and the rest of your loved ones early. You surprised all of us. This isn’t going to be easy. There will be crying nights, all the plans have to be retracted and start again from the scratch. But we gaze on the positive side of what happened. One thing we are sure, God loves you so much that He called you back home so as not to suffer the nastiness of life here on earth. Well done, My faithful servant! Up above on heaven, stare on us. You’re gone but will never be forgotten.

God has ways also of comforting. While writing this, suddenly my playlist sang Kari’s song “Find You on my knee”

And to end this, let me copy and paste some of its lyrics that touched my heart and reminded me to never cease praying, never doubt God's plan and hold always to Him for He knows what He is doing.

“When my hope is gone, when the fear is strong, when the pain is real, when it’s hard to heal, when my faith is shaken and my heart is broken and my joy is stolen, God I know that You lift me up, you’ll never leave me searching.”

ycelah_1813
01.08.14
9:21 pm

doom be doom be doom!

"Even to your old age and gray hairs
    I am He, I am He who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
    I will sustain you and I will rescue you." ---Isaiah 46:4

Tomorrow will be start of an added chapter of my life. Looking back on the past years, I will always be thankful for God’s faithfulness and goodness into my entire stay on earth. Not to mention how immensely grateful I am for my amazing friends, loving kin, understanding work forces and all kind of support system I have. Yeah, I have really have SO much to give thanks for in everyday of my life! 

I am not perfect, I sinned but thank God His grace is boundless.

I am not complete, I have shortcomings but thank God His love is limitless.

I am not rich, but thank God His riches and glorious abound in me.

I may not have all my wants in life but thank God His blessings are immeasurable.

I am wanderer and dreamer.

I have lot of dreams I used to think over the night and then the next morning, it’s still a dream. HAHA! :D

I am a lover.

I love all of you! :*

I am antagonistic rebellion.

I fight for what I think is right.

I speak for what I think is good.

And for those people who get offended on me, who misinterpreted my behavior and misjudged my action, please understand me!  I am just being myself. Holalala.. :p

I am a survivor.

I survived the waves of the sea tossed on me.
I am a seeker.

I exist because I need to seek Him.

I am a server.

I’ve been called to serve the King of kings.

I am predestined to enjoy what tomorrow brings.

I get hurt, betrayed, cried a lot yesterday.

I am a scrapped piece from the nail pierced on His hand.

I am alive because of the life He offered from the cal vary.

Who Am I?

I am who I am because of You.

Life for me will still be a long way journey as I see now.

I pray to God to shower me strength to press through every struggle, endure every trial, and overcome every hurdle through the power of Holy Spirit working in me and through me.

My Creator, when I am down, let me hold on to Your promises from the moment You created my inmost being on my mother’s womb until my hair turned into gray or until the least second of my breath.

"Even to your old age and gray hairs
    I am He, I am He who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
    I will sustain you and I will rescue you." ---Isaiah 46:4

~ycelah is signing off!

12/17/13

10:21 pm

10 WAYS A GOOD WOMAN WILL MAKE YOU A BETTER MAN

September 2, 2013 · by James Michael Sama · in Dating & Relationships. ·

As men, we’ve all been there. The relationshits where the girl you’re dating brings more drama than happiness to your life. Where her immaturity and jealousy stresses you out. Where you question if being a relationship is even something you want.

I do believe, though, that a good woman will bring many positives to your life.

A good woman will support you in all of your ventures. She will be your cheerleader and encourage you to chase after your goals and dreams.

A good woman will make you excited to come home at night. She will be your encouragement after bad days and the first one to congratulate you after good days.

Either way, she will be your reward after all days.

A good woman will make you want to be the best version of yourself, just by being present in your life. You will always want to be more and do more, both for her and for yourself.

A good woman will make you excited for each day to begin. Knowing you have the love of the one you love will give you a new outlook on life.

A good woman will never judge you. She will accept you as you are, giving you more confidence in yourself.

A good woman will teach you about life. The female perspective on the world is completely different than a man’s, and seeing things in different lights often give you a clearer view.

A good woman will be honest with you, whether you like it or not. While being supportive and encouraging, she’ll also tell you if there’s something you need to change and improve, and who doesn’t want to improve?

A good woman will open your mind to new things. Odds are you’ve got different interests – so embarking on hers with her will bring new experiences into your life that you may not have tried without her.

A good woman will help you see yourself how she sees you, in your best light. She will help you recognize the great things about yourself that she sees, and you may not.

A good woman will keep you grounded. Let’s be honest – there has been more than one occasion when you’ve gone to a female friend for advice on any given topic. To have a good woman be the voice of reason in your daily life, will keep you on the right track.

When you have the love of a good woman supporting you, there will be nothing you can’t accomplish.