I saw myself writing again, writing with tears on my eyes. I promise, I’ll try to make this one short and it’s all dedicated to you.
I've been fascinated by your goodness. I've been amazed of your kindness. I've been captivated on your dedication to bring the best for your loved ones. Now, the door on this earth sends you to your real home, I am one of those who felt your lost. The feeling I had now brings the hymn of melancholy, cuddles me with a sad lullaby and stirs up the ink in my pulse. I am writing again because I miss you too and I love you too.
I used to tease your son as “papa’s boy.”
He used to tell me, “Mi, ung remaining 10 minutes, di ko na ipantatawag sa’yo. Tatawagan ko pa kasi si Papa.” “Mi, pakitext naman si Papa, wala kase ako load.”
And I will definitely miss every text conversations we had. Even the phone calls I used to receive from you asking how your son is. Why he is not replying to your text messages.
And I will definitely miss a man who makes me feel, I belong to his family. For every visit I made to your town, you always welcome me as if I am really your daughter. I was even flattered when I heard that you are one of those who felt sad and dismayed when I and your son broke up.
I guessed, I am terribly inlove with your son, what he feels, I can feel. What he lost, I lost too.
Let me cry far apart. And let those tears flow freely from our eyes. When the dawn is done, we'll see the sun up. I can feel the pain that you're feeling now. I can hear the breeze of loneliness. I can see the lonely nights and the weeping days. If only I have the power to bring the life that was lost, I will so as not to see you all grieving. My heart is aching too. I will be missing you too.
And I will definitely miss a man behind who your son is now.
Let me grieve also. Let me say few thankful words. Thank you for bringing up Eric so well. Thank you for planting the seed of goodness, humility, and all the good traits he has now. Thank you for being a good father to him. I can see he is a good son and will be as good father as you are when the time comes.
You left your son and the rest of your loved ones early. You surprised all of us. This isn’t going to be easy. There will be crying nights, all the plans have to be retracted and start again from the scratch. But we gaze on the positive side of what happened. One thing we are sure, God loves you so much that He called you back home so as not to suffer the nastiness of life here on earth. Well done, My faithful servant! Up above on heaven, stare on us. You’re gone but will never be forgotten.
God has ways also of comforting. While writing this, suddenly my playlist sang Kari’s song “Find You on my knee”
And to end this, let me copy and paste some of its lyrics that touched my heart and reminded me to never cease praying, never doubt God's plan and hold always to Him for He knows what He is doing.
“When my hope is gone, when the fear is strong, when the pain is real, when it’s hard to heal, when my faith is shaken and my heart is broken and my joy is stolen, God I know that You lift me up, you’ll never leave me searching.”
ycelah_1813
01.08.14
9:21 pm
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